We humans have a myriad of feelings. We are so complex that I wouldn’t be surprised if there was still some feeling to be named.
Since feelings are our perception of the situation, not all feelings have the same effect on everyone. Most feelings are only in our mind, but sometimes feelings get from us a physical response. I suppose it may be different for everyone.
I have experienced physical ache on my chest due to a broken heart, I had been depressed from loneliness, but it’s the most immediate physical, visceral responses that fascinate me.
I was analyzing myself and I realized that, for me, there are three kind of situations that makes me react without thought, that makes me feel the heat, the dizziness, the sudden deafness, to be blind sided.
One is that moment right before you kiss someone for the first time. I feel such a rush in antecipation that most of the time the memory are no more than flashes. I don’t get this ever again with the same person. I get nervous, aroused, excited, but the adrenaline of that first kiss is never again.
Fear also gets me. I have never been in a situation that caused me panic, although I have been paralyzed by fear. I never had a gun pointed at my head, or someone threaten me with a knife, or seen someone I love in true danger or harmed, but I have been robbed, almost had a car crash, almost got carried away on a river stream, and had the feeling of not being truly safe when I head back home at 4 am after a night out and there’s a man in my way.
The last feeling that takes control over my head is confrontation. I get all heated up when arguing with someone about something that I find really important. To hear someone using the word fag to talk bad about others, or to argue with people about social causes when they come from a very privileged place (such as when men don’t acknowledge the issues of cat calling, or when someone who comes from a wealthy family and never worked for a boss – or worked at all – diminishes the struggles of the working class and pass it as people who don’t control their finances). This one is probably the most problematic, since it makes me so aggressive that I restrain myself from interacting to not overreact.
Since I found the love of my life already and there is no near future possibilities of first kisses, I am stranded with the bad ones, getting visceral feelings from bad things. I’ll have to turn to roller-coasters, that give us fear, but in a controlled environment. Maybe my partner will let me kiss other people? For sanity sake?
What are your visceral feelings?